Whether you’re in your first year of college or finishing up the home stretch, the last semester of each year can be a stressful time. finals seemed so far away, and day-to-day assignments didn’t feel like they held so much weight. But before you know it, the end of the term is upon you, and you’ve only got a few short weeks or months to achieve your academic goals for the year.
If you’re the parent of a high-schooler, you know the pressure surrounding your kid’s performance on the “big kahuna tests.” You know, the SAT’s, PSAT’s, ACT’s, AP exams, and so on. With graduation approaching, those scores hold a lot of power in proving your child has what it takes to succeed in college. If your child has a disability that affects their learning, the stress of these impending exams can feel especially overwhelming. You know your child’s potential and you don’t want their challenges holding them back from success.
There’s no doubt that our country has benefitted from women becoming more involved in the workforce since the 1940’s. However, this cultural shift has created some difficult challenges for families on the home front. There are several factors that make having a parent at home the right choice for many families. But because many of today’s women pursue career endeavors before becoming mothers, they may feel a deep sense of loss and loneliness when they leave the workforce to focus on motherhood.
She did it. She freaking did it. After screaming at your wife 10 times about leaving the kitchen light on overnight, she did it again. Beneath the surface you know it’s not really such a big deal, but it doesn’t matter – you storm into the bedroom, waking her up in an uncontrollable rage. Screams barrel out of you faster than you can process them. You love her, and you know in 20 minutes you’re going to hate yourself for acting this way, so why can’t you stop?
Society has a way of terrifying parents of their children at certain ages. Phrases like “terrible twos,” “threenager,” and, well, just the word “teenager” are enough to make many parents grimace. While no stage of parenting is easy, adolescence seems to be particularly dreaded, as teens gain independence and your old tactics of speed dialing Santa and holding Mr. Teddy hostage no longer seem to cut it.
Excuse me sir, your amygdala’s going haywire
Our brains are naturally wired to respond to threats with worry. When we encounter something troubling, a part of our brain called the amygdala sends out red flags to our bodies to be on high alert. Whether you are facing a dangerous situation like confronting a robber or something positive but nerve-wracking like taking your SAT’s, your amygdala will trigger your body to have symptoms of anxiety. Some people have more sensitive circuitry than others, causing them to experience anxiety symptoms more often.
The death of a loved one is always extremely painful, but having a friend die by suicide is especially devastating. Friendships are an important part of the human experience and impact our happiness, well-being, and sense of belonging. While we don’t get to choose which family we’re born into, we do get to choose who we build friendships with, and having that connection severed by suicide is incredibly traumatic.
Remember that person in high school who was insanely smart, but just didn’t have the drive to reach their potential? You know, that kid that always seemed bored in class, aced every test, but couldn’t be bothered to do their homework. After all, they knew all the answers, had their career plans, so why do the extra work? We’ve also known someone who wasn’t necessarily the most passionate or intelligent one in school, but worked tirelessly to accomplish anything and everything expected of them, no matter how necessary the task seemed.
So where are they now?
Living in the age of social media has its perks. You can look up your long-lost friend from 3rd grade with the click of a mouse. You can see what’s going on almost anywhere in the world at any given time. But constant exposure to everything, and everyone, can also get a little hazardous. Without the right mindset, social media can make you feel insecure about your appearance and your lifestyle.
In short, if you find yourself comparing yourself head to toe with Instagram hoochies or muscle heads, this one’s for you.
Remember the days before you were a parent when you used to dream about what your “future child” would be like. You know, things like, “My future child would never run around the grocery store like those little monsters” or, “My future child would never dare ignore me.”
In the wake of recent school shootings, many of us feel an overwhelming sense of fear and lack of control over such a senseless tragedy. Between social media, word of mouth, and news broadcasts, children are exposed to more and more similar headlines; it can be hard for parents to know how help their children process these tragedies without worsening their anxiety.
Our clinicians at Variations Psychology wanted to share a few insights to guide you in discussing school violence with your children:
Middle age isn’t what it was 50 years ago. Women like Jennifer Lopez, Cindy Crawford, and Halle Berry are all a testament that “50 is the new 20,” and that when it comes to living a full, vivacious life, age is just a number. For many women, their 40’s and 50’s are some of their most enjoyable years.
